It's my Dad's Day
Today is Father’s Day. It is a Father’s Day, and we all post sweet messages and give gifts to show our love, but no earthly possession can actually show love. This week leading up to today, I have had a few separate conversations about the importance of being a father. What that really means. I think in most cases being a good father is genetic. I know that sounds funny, but the best dads I know also had really good dads, my dad included. Their dads are their best friends when they grow old and have kids of their own. A father son relationship is a given. They teach them to play ball, they teach them how to be a Godly man, they go fishin’ together, boy things. A mother daughter relationship is also a given. I have spent countless hours with my mother in deep conversation about life. But, when a father has a good relationship with his daughter, it is a life changer.
Let me explain myself. When I was a little girl, the first relationship I ever saw was my mom and dad. I realize that what I saw growing up is an exception to the rule. My parents are best friends, life partners. When I was a little girl the first man I ever loved was Brian Menke. Growing up we played monster and went screaming through the house (literally scared for our lives). We rode four wheelers, and played with the dogs, and got thrown in the pool. We were always laughing, and he played a big part in that. A good dad teaches his daughter (in my dads case, lots of daughters) that they are worth the world. There is a sense of self-worth that comes from the love of a father. You don’t need the love of a boy to make you happy. You feel secure, or at least I always have. I think the best way to describe the way my dad makes me feel is safe. Not because he is a proud lover of NRA, but because I know he would do anything to make sure I was okay. Lets just take this week for example; I left my wallet at home and didn’t realize this until I was checking out at Kroger. I call my dad and tell him the situation and he is there is 10 minutes with a hug and some cash. He has been out at my house 3 different times this week because my toilet is broken. He drove me to Mt. Sterling for my pre-employment testing. A few weeks ago my tire blew on the way home from Morehead, and he was there and had it changed within 20 minutes. My dad is my actual superhero, and I am 24 years old. He cooked me dinner this week, and made sure he cooked the cabbage without butter so I could eat it. I call him every day if I don’t see him. I am pretty much the girl version of him, which drives my mom a little crazy sometimes, but think secretly makes her proud.
I guess what I want to say most is that a lot of dads don’t feel like they need to have a relationship with their daughters, that the moms take care of that. I have seen it in a lot of people I know. But that is a sad thing, because nothing makes a woman feel more secure with who she is and what she deserves than the reassurance that comes from the love of her dad.
Here are what I think makes the best dads (or what makes my dad great):
1. They are truthful. I know this isn’t hard for most men, because they don’t normally sugar coat things. I like that about my dad. I talk to him about money, cars, and my love life because he will give it to me straight, and that’s usually what I need.
2. They are Godly men. I have never heard my dad complain about church. Not ever. He loves it, and has always made it a very important part of our lives. This is the most important. I would never want to be the one who had force my husband to come to church. I think it’s really cool that my mom found a partner in that. It seems like it gets harder and harder to find.
3. They are hard workers. My dad told me last week that he averages over 500 hours of overtime a year. I would say it was almost double that when we were growing up. He has had to miss Christmas a few times, and had to come to church in his work clothes, but I have NEVER heard him complain. He has been an unbelievable provider for our family, and is pretty dang selfless. His work ethic has always really resonated really deep with me. I know how much sacrifice he makes, and how little sleep he gets.
4. They can fix anything. I know it doesn’t make you a bad dad if you aren’t Mr. Fix-it, but I love this about my dad. I honestly don’t think we have ever hired anyone to do anything. It’s almost a joke the stuff he can figure out and put together.
5. They are strong like superman. The fact that my dad has a six-pack and is almost 50 years old is so cool! I love that I can talk about PRs and workouts with him, and that he can ALMOST beat me in a run (he actually is a lot faster than me). Over the last few years it has been a lot of fun to workout as a family.
6. They don’t miss a thing. My dad was my basketball coach growing up, he was the youth group leader, he never missed a pageant, he volunteered at cross country races. He never missed anything any of us did, and still doesn’t. Neither does his dad, my papaw.
7. He cares about my future. Whether he knows how to put it into the right words sometimes, he worries about me a lot. Before I got hired at my job, he would call me 5 times a day telling me about jobs he found for me. He wants me to be successful with all of his heart.
8. He is a faithful husband. This means the world to me. In a world where there isn’t very many of these men left, my dad would never leave my mom or our family.
9. A good dad cries sometimes. When it is really important, a man should cry. There is nothing embarrassing about loving someone enough to cry. When you look around at the life and family you have created, it should bring tears to your eyes.
I could go on with this forever, because I love my dad so much. He just makes me happy. I think my biggest fear in the world has always been to let him down. He has given me so much, and the only way I can repay him is to make him proud of the way I live my life, and to make sure he doesn’t worry about me. I love you so much, daddy. I can only hope that my future children will be as blessed as I have been.
P.S. My mom deserves a shout out in this. She is the woman behind the man. I know my dad wouldn’t have been able to be the kind of father he is without her. She knows that, and so does he. I love you Momma.
P.S.S. Thank you for loving me (us) unconditionally and making me believe without a doubt that my father in heaven loves me with no boundaries. That is the most precious gift.
P.S.S Thanks for teaching me how to shoot, and for hunting and cooking all that yummy deer meat!!!!
Love you Daddy,